


You're important too.

by Pandigital



Series: 100 ways to say I love you. [19]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-14
Updated: 2015-11-14
Packaged: 2018-05-01 13:51:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5208254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pandigital/pseuds/Pandigital
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All he wanted was to be happy, for just a little while.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're important too.

They had been avoiding this conversation since Hawke had been raised to the status of Viscount. The Templars gave her no peace and she was at her wits end. She had been thinking about this for days. She had been avoiding him for days. She wanted to go to the Circle and turn herself in. Let someone else take over the mantle of Viscount. She had told him her plan when she had asked him to sit next to her on the bed so they could talk. The moment it had left her lips he had jumped to his feet, grabbed her by the shoulders and snarled out, “No, Hawke.”

She sighed, her brown hair falling to tickle his wrist, sending a shiver up his arms and down his spine, “Fenris, this is a problem that has a simple solution.”

“Your death is a simple solution?”

She looked up at him, her brown eyes somber and misty with unshed tears as she spoke, “Yes. Craver is a Grey Warden now. Bethany is dead, my sweet sister. Mother is gone now too. If my death will finally ease the waves of terror in Kirkwall then so be it.”

“I will not allow it.” Fenris said as he let go of her shoulders and stood with his arms crossed in front of his chest before her. He could feel his heart racing. This woman was going to be the death of him. She narrowed her eyes at him. Her hands clenched in her lap.

“Excuse me? You will not allow it? And who are you that I must bow so low?”

“Your everything.” Fenris answers with ease. He has lost Hawke twice. Once to his own foolish whims and almost to the giant blade of the Qunari Arishok. He can not lose her again. His heart would stop if he lost her again. He bows his head as he whispers, “And you are MY everything.”

She heave a heavy sigh and hangs her head in her hands. Her elbows pressed deep into her knees, “Fenris, I am a mage. You are a former slave with no memory of what or who he even was before the life of a slave. I can’t and shouldn’t be your everything.”

Fenris glares down at her instead of looking at his feet, his voice slowly getting louder as he speaks “You are. And I will not allow you to walk out of this house and throw yourself onto the fire for those who will not even remember your name come the morrow!”

Hawke it seems can take no more and jumps to her feet, crowding into his space and yelling at the top of her lungs, “IT IS MY LIFE AND I MAY DO AS I PLEASE WITH IT!”

Fenris matches her pitch and tone and yells right back, “THEN YOU WILL NEED TO KILL ME AS WELL FOR I CAN NOT BEAR THE THOUGHT OF LIVING WITHOUT YOU!”

Hawke snaps her mouth shut with a harsh click and takes a step back. Her knees hit the bed and she is sitting once more. As though he had struck her with his hands. She stares at him wide eyed and in a daze. She grips the blankets beneath her hands. She opens and closes her mouth a few times before a single word floats out, “...W-what?”

Fenris will not look her in the eyes, “Foolish human. Damn you women and your eyes. Your eyes that shine like my brands with an inner light and do not wish to live without.”

She tries to stand but Fenris falls to his knees and bows his head into her lap. She pets his hair softly and he hugs her tightly about the waist, “Fenris?” They are silent for a long time. Fenris removes his hands from her waist and cups her cheeks in his warm palms after he places her hands, both of them, over his heart. He does not break eye contact with her when he speaks.

“Kill me then and be done with it. I will wait for you in the place between life and death. Together we shall leave this mortal coil.”

Hawke jerks her face away but Fenris holds to her tightly, so she jerks her hands away instead and hides them under her thighs, “No. You don’t need to die. And you keep dodging my question. What did you mean? Why did you say that?”

Fenris only kisses her forehead, “I speak the truth. If you shall die then I will as well, for the life I see without you in it is not one I would relish living.”

Hawke shakes her head and tries to move farther up the bed. She ends up on her back and Fenris follows, hiding his face in her neck. She moves her head away and speaks, “Fenris, you are important to me. You don’t need to die. Only I do.”

“As you said, it is your life and you may do as you please with it.” Fenris says into her hair and then lifts his head fully to watch her for she will not turn to look at him, “By that logic, my life is mine as well. I have chosen to tie my life with yours. When you leave this plane I will as well.”

“Why?” she whispers.

Fenris give a mirthless chuckle and hides once more in the hair that smells of fresh rain, lighting on the horizon, and the soft but gentle fog on the coast after a long night of warm rain. He hides in her hair often, in the middle of the night. His body curling into hers, chasing away demons he can not fight. He answers her, “You know my past and yet you ask questions that even that fool witch would know the answer to.”

“Fenris.” she says in a firm tone.

She wants the truth and so he tell hers, holding her gaze and her face in his hands, “I was a slave. I had NOTHING. I had no name. I had no life. My entire world was pain, and fear, and wondering if I would die my master's hands. Then I was free and the man who enslaved me dead. I have his home, which I do not want nor need. I have friends, of whom I cherish. But you? You have sunk down into some black pit inside my heart. I fear you are not there, my heart would no longer remember to beat, for the only thing in this world I want and need above all else would be gone.”

“Fenris...I’m not…” she tries to reason, tears spilling like blood into his hands and over them into the hairline that they can reach.

“To me you are. You are important to me, Hawke. So if you plan to go and die. Kill me now. But before you do, please. Let me have one last kiss so that I will leave this mortal life with a smile upon my face.”

She does and she hugs him after with a small sniff and a watery, “Silly elf. You’re important too.” 


End file.
